FICTION

Excerpt from 2 minutes

I swear, I can feel a heartbeat,’ Linn looks at me with wide, serious eyes. I push away her hand, which is pressed against my lower abdomen.
	‘That’s my heartbeat,’ I say, annoyed, but at the same time I feel it accelerating in my chest and my stomach cramping with fear. Fear sits in my stomach. It always has. That means I constantly have stomach pains and can never pinpoint the cause. That’s why my lower abdomen is now contracting painfully. I groan and double over. Linn looks worried.
	‘I once read that pregnancy feels like menstrual cramps in the first few weeks.’ Me too.
	‘Do you know what else feels like period pain? Period pain!’ I hiss at her.
	Linn sits up with an offended expression on her face. Until just now, she was lying half on my small bed, her knees on the floor as if she were praying, but her hands on my lower stomach and not clasped together in prayer. Praying might not be a bad idea at this point.
	‘Maybe you should just take the test,’ she says with her back to me. She sounds hurt, but I’m too preoccupied with my possible impending motherhood to feel bad. She’s been a good friend to me, even buying me the pregnancy test at the pharmacy because I was too afraid that someone would recognize me.
	But the idea of knowing for sure scares me even more. I’ve never understood how people can demonize this state of uncertainty. I’d rather not destroy the last bit of hope I have left.