CREATIVE NON-FICTION

No Twitching, Blinking or Beaming

The long headline was deliciously perplexing and enchanting. It read “No One at Waffle House Remembers FEMA Official Who Says He Teleported In”. 
	Travelling to near and distant places in an instant is a down-to-earth concept to children of the 1960s. Bewitched, I Dream of Jeannie and Star Trek portrayed the scientifically impossible as ordinary. It could be real.
	A trusted New York Times article. I clicked through.
	The alleged teleporter - initials, ‘GP’ - claimed to have been transported from his home to the Waffle House in Rome, Georgia - fifty miles away. A moment before, he had been thinking about going there. 
	The early April article felt like a prank, but curiosity propelled me.
	In March 2026, CNN profiled  ‘GP’  who had recently been appointed to a top U.S. fed job. The report revealed numerous supernatural experiences that ‘GP’ had recounted in a podcast over a year earlier. A surge of media erupted across America - particularly on April first. The Stephen Colbert Show took an absurdist twist promoting Teleportation Waffles. 
	 ‘GP’ , confronted with demands for details, alludes to a spiritual influence, and that he was on medication for cancer treatment at the time.
	The Federal Emergency Management Agency, his employer, have offered no explanations.  ‘GP’  oversees disaster management. 
	A protocol for teleporting supplies to citizens after hurricanes, earthquakes and fires would be a spectacular outcome to this story. 
	Alternatively,  ‘GP’  could channel Samantha or Jeannie to learn how to time travel back to 2024.